Focus on God

So, as I said, Saturday was not a very good day. To help the situation, I was listening to music or sermons on my iPod, but for some reason the music didn't help the situation. I was listening to Tim Hughes live album from London and normally, the album helps me get back on my feet, but for some reason ... God ... the music was just not cutting it ... until the next morning.
Sometimes I will wake up to a song. It can be Christian or non-Christian, but either way, I have learned that when I wake up to a song, there is significance. I don't sense it right away, but for some reason, I will figure it out later in the day. Anyway, I woke up to the lines of one of Tim Hughes' song ... "I'll remember you ... I'll remember all the things you've done ... remembering the cross ... remembering ... I'll remember you." The significance of this is that as I shared in my last post the night before I told Carrie about how bad my day had been and how discouraged I was. As my loving wife, instead of saying "there, there, everything will be okay." She said to me, "Maybe God wants you to focus on Him and His character instead of just calling out to Him for help." Can you see the connection now? I woke up to the lines saying, "I'll remember you ... and the things you have done."
So, what did I do ... I prayed and called out His attributes and character. What happened? Breakthrough. I looked at my times of treatment as times where I am literally locked away by myself with God. No one to interfere and no one to disturb. I was in the Near-Infrared Sauna and I had my music playing outside the sauna and I was trying to pray in tongues and calling out the things of God and who He is. Good times. I didn't make it through the whole session I was supposed to do, but I know there was breakthrough. At least there was for me in the spiritual sense. I was loosening up. I started singing in some of my sessions while listening to my music because I said to myself that I don't care if people hear me. Better that they hear me and ask me what I was doing then to be ashamed. That's definitely been one of the things that God has been drawing out of me. Am I ashamed to express what is inside of me and to reveal who I really am? You betcha, but I am slowly letting that guard down and letting God in to do His healing work in me.