Perfect timing ... Testify ... Perfect DJ ... Steam ... How much more?

Another day of treatment ... another day of new mercies and goodness. I woke up this morning feeling really cruddy. My back was sore in the same spot (left shoulder blade - a muscle gets really tight for some reason) and I didn't feel very energetic. I pulled it together and walked over to the clinic with Carrie and Ezra. The problem was that Carrie wasn't feeling too good either. She has been a little worried about the baby and whether or not everything is okay. If you read this, please pray for Carrie and the baby. Please pray that the baby is healthy and continues to grow properly in Carrie's womb. Thank you.
We got to the clinic and I didn't really want to eat very much, but I pushed through and went on to do my treatments. I've hit the auto-pilot stage, but unfortunately we are leaving on Wednesday. Anna-Maria was pointing out today that the time has gone by so fast. She couldn't believe that it has already been two weeks. I can't believe it either. Anyway, we knew the time would come that we would have to go back. So, not a lot of energy and I was literally falling asleep in some of my treatments because I was so tired. I was supposed to change my pain patch, but thought I would hold out for a little longer, but not a good idea. (I learned later that my pain med's is very addictive physically and psychologically, which is not good. Hopefully, the plan is to wean myself off of it completely.) Thank, God, for Carrie. As I said in my other blog, I wasn't feeling very good and in tears at times. Carrie was there for me even though she wasn't feeling very good. Holding my hand and encouraging me to hang in there. I was so thankful that Carrie was there at that moment. She stuck by me while I was doing my sauna treatment reading to me some of the things she was learning from the book she was reading about cancer. Basically, she was there at the right time and at the right place. Today was a lot of things happening at the right time at the right place.
So, I was at lunch today and normally I would have to sit on the side with Carrie and Ezra at a separate table because the other table is full with the other guests, but for some reason today Carrie and Ezra weren't at lunch and Jesse and Sonia were not there either. So, I sat with Richard, Ruth-Ann, Brenda, and Ted. As I sat, I felt compelled to share about what God is doing in me and my conversations with Dr. Tony. As I was testifying about the great things God has been showing me and revealing in me, I found my energy level going up. I found my spirit rising and being edified. Where did that come from? Was it because I just switched my pain patch a few minutes earlier? No. I totally believe the Holy Spirit was in agreement with me ... lifting my spirit as I was testifying of His goodness and His work in me. I learned this: Testify because it does my spirit good. God didn't have to lift my energy level or spirit. He could have left me, but He didn't. I was so encouraged by this and I hope the others were encouraged by it too. Either way, I learned a good lesson: Testify because it does the body good. I had a chance to talk to Jesse and Sonia later about what I shared at lunch and to encourage them to let God do His healing work on them. I hope and pray that God will do a great work in them.
As the day progressed, it was time for me to do my sono-therapy in the tub. Normally, the nurses will prep things for me, but there was only one nurse on staff today because one of the nurses, Teresita, went to the States with Paul and Elio to help with the at-home-program. This put a lot of pressure on Anna-Maria because she had to tend to four patients and different schedules and on top of this she had a staff meeting. Ugh. I didn't know this was going on, so I got on with setting up my treatment and thought if Anna shows up and can help, great. If not, I will do what I can do and not stress about it. I set the timer and got on with my ultra-sound therapy (sono). I was playing my music to keep me company (New Day albums) and I had it on shuffle as usual. What I have learned over the past week and a half is that God is the best DJ you can have. I know my iPod is random in selecting the song order, but I believe that God has a finger in all of this. All this week whether it's been song or sermon, the order has been perfect in what I needed to hear or not hear. Even the timing of songs finishing has been amazing. Anyway, as I was listening to my New Day music, I found myself praying out in tongues, worshipping God and just enjoying Him. I gave thanks for the boost in energy and how He is great in all He does. At that moment, I prayed that He would lead and guide me to where I should put the sensor on my body for maximum effectiveness. I was putting the sensor on spots longer and focusing on areas that I thought needed more attention. As the time progressed, I thought that I would try to see if I could reach my back so that I wouldn't need any help. No success. I stressed for a few seconds, but soon thought that it was okay. I purposefully chose not to stress about it and to let it go. If someone came to help, great. If not, that's okay. So, I prayed that I would do what I can and be satisfied with it.
The timer counted down and when there was 3 minutes and 20 seconds left, I heard the door open because the door was around the corner of the bathroom. It was Anna-Maria. She left her meeting early to come and give me help. What perfect timing? That's God. He's so good. When I chose to let it go and leave it to God, He was faithful and totally pulled it together. I didn't shout out for help, and there was Anna-Maria. She helped me finish the rest of the treatment and the other cool thing was that as I prayed that God would guide my hand while I was doing the treatment, I didn't mention anything about guiding other people as they were doing the treatment, but guess what happened? Anna-Maria focused a lot of attention on my left shoulder blade. The spot that was really sore and tight in the morning, which was a spot that I really wanted to focus on, but couldn't reach ... it was the very spot that Anna spent a lot of time. She didn't do the usual general brush strokes that everyone was doing, but she was doing tiny circles in the area ... spending a lot of time in the area. How cool is that? I was totally blown away ... seriously. Answer to prayer. Right there and then. Thank you, God.
I was thinking in the tub about how great God is and the verse came to mind, "He who did not spare his own Son, but gave him up for us all—how will he not also, along with him, graciously give us all things?" What a great God we serve. As I am writing this, I know that I am still working out my insecurities and incomplete understanding of grace, but I sit encouraged that God is at work in me to reveal to me not only His greatness but how much He loves me and how I can grow in my relationship with Him. That is my prayer - grow in my walk with Him. More than anything, I want to have a close and intimate walk with Jesus. Not out of duty. Not out of anything but a desire to love Him and to know Him.
Why? Because of what happened after my son0-therapy session. I decided to do my infra-red treatment after my son0-therapy. The infra-red treatment is a basically an infra-red lamp shown on my target spots (chest and neck). There was nothing new today about the treatment except for what happened. I don't know if you have heard of "gold-dust" or other weird sensations that are associated with the holy spirit, but my experience today felt like and reminded me of one of those situations.
I had the lamp pointed at my chest and as it was shining on my chest, I started to see steam rise from my chest. Now, before I started, I tried as best as I could to get all the water off of me. There was no moisture on my chest when I started, but for some reason steam was rising from my chest. The first thought that came to mind was: God, are you burning the cancer from my lungs? I didn't feel a burning sensation, but I felt the warmth of the lamp and there was no denying the fact that there was steam (or what looked like smoke) coming up from my chest. I found a lot of encouragement from this because I have been praying that my time at the clinic would end with major healing or signs of His work in me. I wish I could have taken a picture, but I can still see the steam rising. Again, thank you, God, for what you are doing and even the little signs to encourage me along the way. I am praying in faith that God will uproot all that needs to be uprooted and heal completely for His glory and praise.